IUI in a Nutshell

There are only so many words that can describe IUI. I found an amazing short video that explains it start to finish. I learned a couple of things, myself. Enjoy!

CD18 - Stomach Flu and Inconsiderate Ramblings

     I was sick as a dog on Friday, CD16. I even had to call Emmy's Grandma to have her come pick her up. I was wiped. I don't know where or how I picked it up, but I did. I HATE being sick. I think the worst thing about being sick when you are TTC is the, "Maybe it's morning sickness," questions. Let me tell you, NEVER ask a person going through infertility if they are pregnant or are having pregnancy symptoms. Most of the time they are NOT pregnant and you are rubbing it in.
     Now, most of these comments don't bother me much any more. But, this comment back in July would have sent me into tears. I have since come to realize that most people don't know any better and really do have the best of intentions. Of course, I don't think it will ever stop being annoying.
     It reminds me of another annoying interaction I recently had. My chiropractor, that I've been seeing since Emmy was a baby, quit. My acupuncturist also quit, but I still see her at her new practice. So, they hired another chiropractor who is also an acupuncturist. At our first visit he asked me about my history in chiro care and acupuncture. I mentioned that I see my acupuncturist for infertility and he asked about all that I've been through in that area. This is a pretty standard practice and I am used to having to tell various practitioners about our struggles.
    Well, after my adjustment, he mentions to me that his wife is pregnant. "That's great," I said, "Congrats! It is such a blessing." He then gave me a very shy, cheeky look and said, "It was a total accident. We weren't planning it at all!" He said it like he wanted sympathy, but it also had a bragging tone, as well. I told him that the more people I meet, the more I realize that God intended it to be that easy and we're just a special case.
     Like I said before, comments like this don't really effect me emotionally anymore. That doesn't make them any less annoying, though. How could someone be so thoughtless? That's like me saying, "I inherited a house from my deceased so and so. It was a total surprise," to a homeless beggar. Some things should just be kept to yourself.
     Of course, I wish I didn't have to hear things like this. It reminds me that most people can have a baby whenever they decide and it really shouldn't be this hard. Having a child whenever we choose should be one of our basic humanly rights. When that is denied you, it can be the heaviest weight to carry. Not only do you deal with your own personal struggles of not getting what you desired and always dreamed, but you also have to deal with the rest of the world, which is mostly fertile. The world seems to move on around you while you're stuck in this limbo full of questions and despair.
     Most of these feelings have been dealt with and I have come to the conclusion that life isn't always fair. But, thankfully, we have one beautiful little girl who I get to spend 95% of my time with. I believe that God, whoever he is, has chosen a select few of us to go through this for various reasons. Not knowing God personally, I don't think I will ever really know what those reasons might be. But, I will continue convincing myself that I am special and all of this has made me strong enough to do anything. And, it has made my marriage strong enough to handle the toughest of struggles. Not many would be strong enough to handle this. I carry this weight very proudly and personally. It has made me who I am and hopefully there is a map out there with my name on it with a very special destination.

CD13 - The Day After

     It's been a day since our IUI with poor sperm count/motility. After a night to reflect, Jim told me that he imagines his sperm is like Homer's, demonstrated below:

CD12 - IUI and MFI

     Today was the day. Insemination. Intrauterine Insemination(IUI), to be exact. Our day started with a date with a plastic cup. These dates are never the most exciting or sexy. And we NEVER really look forward to them. Jim took his sample to the RE's office first thing and when he got back I headed to the acupuncturist's office. I've been practicing Traditional Chinese Medicine for the past 5 months, or so. When I got back, Emmy's Grandma was already there and Jim and I headed back to the RE's office.
     We waited for about 10 minutes and then were called back to the room. I was instructed to undress from the waste down and wait for the doctor. I did as instructed as Jim played on my phone. He doesn't have a smart phone, so any chance he gets to fiddle on mine, he takes. When the doctor came in, he explained the process and went through the sperm washing results with us. When you are doing IUI, they take your sperm sample and "wash" it. This basically means that they concentrate it and take all the crap out that is dead or unnecessary. The washed results are much lower because most of it has been stripped.

 Jim has had a semen analysis(SA) done twice and they generally went like this:

Total count - Between 16-24 million
Total motility - 40%

    Those are the only 2 numbers I will go over as they are the most important. Motility is forward moving. That means that 60% of his "guys" generally swim in circles or go no where. The average count for a typical guy is between 20-100 million and average motility is 50%. We've always known that we were dealing with slight Male Factor Infertility(MFI) but our doctor always referred to these results as "borderline".

    Today's count, post wash, was as follows:

Total count - 8 million
Fast Forward moving - 0%
Total motility - 10%

     The doctor was not happy with this. He didn't use the word "borderline" anymore. He used the term "IVF" instead. Up until this point, he thought that we were perfect candidates for IUI. But, these numbers are too low. Post wash, they hope the total count will be at least 10 million with a total motility of at least 50%. He explained that he will keep doing IUI's as long as we want, but IVF would be our best option.
     We have always said that because we already have a child, IUI is the furthest we will go. IVF is much more involved and takes a lot more time, energy, and money.
     After explaining our odds, the doctor went ahead with the procedure. I put my legs up in those awful stirrups and laid back. I was chatting with the doctor and the nurse about things that I can't really recall now and before I knew it, we were done. I was instructed to lay there for 20 minutes and they left the room.
     Jim and I were both deep in thought most of the time trying to make sense of what he just told us. We were both a bit shocked that the results were so poor. Even his worse SA wasn't this bad. He's very hopeful, but I'm not really counting on this working.
     We have made a few dietary changes and recently discovered that Jim is vitamin D deficient, so I'm really hoping that once that is resolved, our problems will be over. I'll keep this updated, but our blood pregnancy test isn't until 2/6/12, which will be CD26.
     Thanks everyone for reading and please let me know if I've been too vague about anything and you have questions.

CD 10 - Trigger Time!

     This actually happened last night, but 10:15 pm might as well be 2 am for us. I had to wake Jim up from a dead sleep to stab me in the ass with a needle. After that, I didn't feel much like lingering on the couch with my rear in the air long enough to write a post.
     Moving on, I prepped the needle at 10:05. Here is a picture tutorial:

This is the complete package. I got a bottle of sterilized water,

a bottle of powdered medicine, a syringe with a mixing needle,

and a needle for injection.

First, I had to get 1cc of water out of the sterilized water bottle.

Then, I had to insert the water into the powdered medicine bottle.

This is the medicine all mixed up.

Then, I had to switch the needles on the syringe and pull all the medicine into the syringe.

 

The pic on the left is the needle all prepped. The pic on the right is the Follistim needle. You can see the obvious difference in length. The needle is so much longer so it can reach the muscle. The Follistim needle is to go into fat, so it is shorter.

   

     When  I got the needle all prepped, I had to wake my sleeping beauty and give him the instructions. All he knew was that it was going in my butt cheek. After telling him what to do, he immediately looked worried. I laid on the couch, ass up, and showed him where to grab and stab.

     Luckily, Jim was on the ball and reminded me that I needed an alcohol swab. Oh yeah, forgot that part. So, after I was disinfected, Jim grabbed a chunk of flesh and held the needle about 6 inches away and said, "I don't think I can do this." I gave him a pep talk and we started again. This happened about 5 times before he actually stuck me.

     I was actually surprised at how little it hurt. I barely felt the needle and Jim did a great job! When it was done, I got up to fix myself some tea. As I walked, it got a bit sore. It felt like a charlie horse and I soon learned that sitting was not an option. That's when I ditched the tea and opted for bed instead.

    Today, I'm feeling pretty good. The spot is a bit sore and I have a small bruise, but not that's not so bad. I can definitely feel something cooking in there. I have been having cramping on my right side for the past few days and it has actually intensified. I'm really looking forward to tomorrow.

     I have to say that I'm a bit worried I will ovulate early and miss the window. I'm hoping they'll do another ultrasound tomorrow to be sure. Thanks for reading!

     

CD8 - Mom Butt and Dreams

Went in this morning for another follie check. There's still only two on the right side. But, today they were measuring 17mm. The doc was very happy with their size and shape. He also noted that my lining looked, "awesome!" That was a huge relief. I've never been monitored mid-cycle before, so I never knew what my lining was like. I've been drinking POM juice because it's suppose to help puff up your lining. I guess I'll keep to it.

I was instructed to do the trigger tomorrow, CD9, at exactly 10:15 pm. Then the actual insemination will occur on Monday morning, CD12. The meds come to me pre-mixed, so I received detailed instructions on how to mix the meds. The nurse drew me a picture detailing where the shot needed to be injected:

No, those are not breasts. That, according to my nurse, is a buttocks, my buttocks. I understand what she was getting at, but it still gave me a chuckle. I reminded me of the dreaded "mom butt" that my sister and I accuse each other of having. I'd have to say that this would be the queen of all mom butts.

Nonetheless, it gives you an idea of where I will be sore on Monday morning. I will post more about the trigger tomorrow. Today, I'm going to enjoy the thought that I have two beautiful chances waiting in the wings to be fertilized.

I love this time in my cycle. It's the most optimistic time. There is no worry, concern, or tests. It is the time of the month where I dream of the future and all that could be. We are expecting quite a bit of snow today and I'm looking forward to snuggling in with Emmy and Jim and dreaming of her future brother or sister.

CD7 - 1st Follie Check

     Well, I had my first follicle check today. It showed that I had 2 13mm follicles on my right side and nothing on my left. I've always known that lefty was a bit sluggish, so I'm not terribly surprised. I was hoping for 3, but since I am starting out on a pretty low dose of Follistim, I guess this is good.
     I was told to continue at the same dose and return for another follie check on Friday, CD9. I am hoping those two little superstars keep growing at a steady pace and we can trigger* this weekend. I am thinking we'll be set for the IUI on Monday, CD12. Fingers crossed!


*A trigger is a shot of HCG that is given to induce ovulation.

CD3 - First Dose

     It is CD3 and I just took my first dose! I was so nervous while eating dinner at my parent's. They recommend you take it between 7-11 pm. I decided that I'd take it at 8 because I knew Emmy would be in bed. By 6:30 I was sweaty and a tad gassy(my telltale nervous sign).
     This had to be taken in my belly. It has to be shot into fat, so the belly is the obvious place. For how nervous I was, I dialed up the dose, pinched my fat, and stuck the needle in like I had been doing it all my life. I just hope my body responds like an old pro. I will do this every night, same dosage, for the next 4 days. On Wednesday, CD7, I will head into the RE to get my follicles checked. They will be checking to see how many follies the follistim is working on. Hopefully, it will be between 2-4. I will update more on Wednesday!

CD2 - Dildo Cam

     I say "dildo cam" very affectionately. What it really is is an ultra sound wand that is inserted into my hoo-ha to get a good view of my uterus and ovaries. I got a good look at both today and I was surprised to find that they are all there and functioning. There were no cysts, which is what we were hoping. If there were, the cycle would either be postponed or canceled.      After the ultrasound, I was brought into the nurses office for a tutorial of the meds that I'll be taking. It looks like I'll be taking 75iu of Follistim a day. I'll be injecting myself in the fatty tissue of the belly for at least 10 days. During this time, I will be monitored through U/S and B/W. What they are looking for is the follicle growth. A follicle is what the egg grows inside of. When it gets to a certain size, generally 17-22 mm, it is ready to open up and release an egg. Hence, OVULATION! YAY!
     However, when you are taking these meds, they don't just trust your body to release all of those eggs. They require you to take a "trigger" shot. This makes sure that all of the follicles will burst open. This shot must be taken in a muscle. This muscle is located in the ass. I assured them that my ass was way too "meaty" for such a shot, but they didn't believe me. I was then informed that this shot must be administered at home and by my husband. This worried me. Jim has never had the stomach for much and is so scared that his freakish strength will somehow injure me that he has never even enjoyed the occasional play-wrestle. I have a hard time invisioning him stabbing the needle in my "buttox like a dart."
     So, I will start the injections tomorrow. I will post more about that then!

And It Begins - CD1

     In the infertility world, every day is referred to as a "cycle day". Well, because I started my period, today is CD1. Three months from today, I will either be pregnant or celebrating the end of our journey by drinking as much coffee as I want. Doesn't seem so scandalous, but when you are TTC, coffee is a big no no. I might add a cigarette just because I can. Either way, I will be feeling very relieved that there is a conclusion.
     I do have to say that this is the most excited I have ever been to start my period. I have always been interested in medical "stuff" and I am just going to look at my body as a giant science experiment. My hypothesis? Well, I have no idea. I do know, the more relaxed I am the better results I will have.
     To stay relaxed, I will be doing acupuncture, massage, and avoiding situations that will add any kind of stress to my life. Mom, this means that I will not be helping you clean out any of your cabinets. I will also be watching as many funny movies as I can this month. Much to Jim's dismay, this will probably include a lot of terrible romantic comedies. Most of which will contain Meg Ryan.
     I already have an ultrasound and blood work appointment set up for tomorrow. The ultrasound is looking for any cysts that may have formed. The blood work is checking to make sure I'm not turning into a werewolf. I'll keep this updated often. Let the games begin!

It Has Arrived!!!!!

     It's like Christmas, all over again! My FedEx package finally got here today, after a "mechanical delay". I was so excited I met the FedEx guy on the porch. He said, "You've been waiting for this, haven't you?" I said, "Ummm, yeah!" I think I expected him to know what was in there and how important it was.
   So, here it is. Below are pics of the tonic that will, hopefully, bring us the final member of our family!

This is the box.

This is what was in the box. This box was well worth the $25 I paid for it.

Those ice packs were still frozen solid!

Here is a close up of all the contents. That case contains a "pen" that will help me inject the meds.

Each box contains a vial of medicine and needle cartridges.

This vial is worth about $1,200! For this tiny vile! So crazy!

     Thanks to my donor I have not been going completely crazy stressing about this. She has been really great about explaining things, keeping up with emails, and showing a genuine concern for me and my family. I don't know how I got so lucky! I do feel really good, though, now that everything is here. It still feels a bit surreal. It really makes you believe that everything happens for a reason and we really are all connected.

     More to come!

Shipping The Golden Ticket

     It has been a few days since I received the amazing news that meds would be donated to me. Although the high has not worn off, it was time to start researching ways to get the meds to my house! The donor lives in New Jersey. According to Google Maps, we are 800 miles and 14 hours away. They all need to stay refrigerated and while I'm glad it's not summer, there still needs to be some type of ice packing going on. I went with this company I found on Amazon that specializes in shipping supplies for perishable goods. They showed examples of lasagna and cookies being shipped cross country and arriving cold as can be. I don't know if they ever thought that someone would be using their product to be shipping $5,000 worth of fertility drugs 800 miles, but I figured if they can keep grandma's lasagna safe, my meds will be good.

     Now that I had the receptacle fashioned, I had to start looking into shipping costs. Never in my life did I think that overnight shipping would cost so much! It looks like it will cost about $150 just to ship this little package! As my mom would say, "Holy sugarbooger!" I guess it's worth it to save $5,000, though. So, I won't complain too much.

    So, it looks like the supplies will arrive at the donor's house early next week and the meds should arrive on time to start my next cycle. Thankfully, I started this process well ahead of time in preparation for any set backs. See, guys, I'm not a procrastinator with EVERYTHING:)