Ok. So I know I said we were done. But, 20 pounds lost, 5 months of Prozac, and an increasingly awesome daughter has given me the desire to keep going. It's been 7 months since our failed IVF cycle. The plan was to move on and accept that I won't have another child. That more intervention was not only too stressful to mention, but too expensive, as well.
I have come to realize that no matter what, this is in my control. I can try as many times as I want. It's just money and no one can put a price on everything that having another child brings. I WILL have another baby.
We have been discussing our options. We are looking into several avenues. All of them include IVF with ICSI. And all of them will include us paying out of pocket for everything. I have one 900iu vial of Follistim left that will save us about $1,000. The options are as follows:
#1 Go back to our original clinic and beg for a discount. The timing of the cycle/s totally depends on the discount they give us. This is really what I'd prefer, as I love my RE and the nurses are the best.
#2 An IVF vacation. Other countries can offer IVF at a deeply discounted price. Most of them have the same, or better success rates as clinics in the U.S. Plus, most of them offer discount programs for subsequent cycles if your first doesn't succeed.
Another thing we are considering is funding. My parents have offered a generous donation to assist, but we will be responsible for most of it. We can either do the IVF in the near future and take out a medical loan or we can wait until the end of the year and work our asses off to save some money, in the meantime.
The problem with waiting is that time is ticking on my end. I'm only 29, but all of my numbers have been fading fast. So, just a few months could change a lot.
I have started calling around today and have some good leads. I have yet to talk to my original clinic and would like to speak with them before I proceed with anything.
I will update when I speak with them!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
I Have Abandoned You!
Oh, blog, how I have abandoned you. I feel guilty because I have not wrapped up my IVF cycle here. I am going to give you the short version. Basically after the retrieval it went like this:
I don't think I'll keep this blog up. There's really no Infertility News to report anymore. We are giving up and moving on. Of course, we will never avoid, but I will no longer be charting, peeing on things, or living by Fertility Friend's calendar. Thank you all for reading And if anyone comes across this that has any questions, please feel free to ask. Good bye!
- Day after retrieval we found out that nothing fertilized.
- They performed a procedure called "Emergency ICSI or Rescue ICSI" that you can read about here. It is the same procedure explained, just a day later.
- Doctor told us not to get our hopes up that we would even make it to transfer...devastated
- Found out a day later that we had 3 embryos...phew
- 2 days later we transferred 2 embryos, one of which was a really good one
- Found out 2 weeks later that nothing took
- Done
I don't think I'll keep this blog up. There's really no Infertility News to report anymore. We are giving up and moving on. Of course, we will never avoid, but I will no longer be charting, peeing on things, or living by Fertility Friend's calendar. Thank you all for reading And if anyone comes across this that has any questions, please feel free to ask. Good bye!
Thursday, May 10, 2012
CD12 - Harvest Time!
Today was an interesting day. My egg retrieval was originally scheduled for 9am. But, Jim and I forgot to administer the trigger shot and ended up doing it four hours late. So, my egg retrieval time got pushed back to 1:00pm.
The bad thing was that I was not allowed to eat AT ALL until an hour after my ER time. After I woke up from the procedure they shoved goldfish in my face and the whole package was gone in a matter of seconds. I was like a rabid raccoon. Shameless.
But let me back up a bit. When we arrived at the clinic I was instructed to give a urine sample. I hadn't had anything to drink since 6am and it was only a small glass of water. Needless to say the sample was small and looked a bit like maple syrup. Not good.
We were then shown our way back to the "man's room" and I was instructed to disrobe from my waist down and put on a glorious gown, booties, and hair net. I was not thrilled that I sent my husband to do his work looking so sexy. I really didn't want him to have too easy of a time. I signed some papers and left Jim to peruse the clinic's erotic DVD selection. He told me later he was not impressed.
I was lead to the way back of the clinic by the anesthesiologist, Doris, to the retrieval room. It was insanely bright. There were at least 10 more florescent lights than needed. In the center of the room was a chair donned with fancy stirrups and surrounded with all sorts of equipment. I was told to take a seat and answered some more questions. Next, my doctor and his nurse entered. Everyone had surgery scrubs, masks, booties, gloves, etc. Sitting there with my legs in the air I found myself feeling like I was in the middle of a Stanley Kubrick movie and something very bazaar was about to take place. It was so surreal.
The doctor turned on Neil Diamond and the very gentle Doris got to work. She placed the IV with no effort and told me she was going to administer the medicine. There was some talk about the Doctor breaking out into song and I told them that was funny and then BAM! I was out.
Next thing I knew, I was in a recliner in the recovery room. Someone could have removed my kidneys, a toe, and probably my soul and I would have had no idea. I was slowly coming out of it and the nurse was checking on me every so often. I kept asking how many eggs they got and where Jim was. The answer was always, "Seven," and,"He's not out yet."
I was very happy about the seven but a little nervous about my husband. After I tore into my goldfish like a honey badger and drank my apple juice he finally came in. I could tell he was irritated. He told me that he was instructed to ring this door bell when he was finished and no one ever came. He told me he waited for almost an HOUR! What?! How long had I been out?! It felt like 15 minutes. Turns out, I was in recovery for over 45 minutes. I highly recommend whatever it was they gave me. Good times.
After I was awake enough to stand and put my pants back on we left. I was told some spotting and light cramping were normal and to not eat anything fried or greasy until tomorrow.
So Jim and I headed straight for Mr. Submarine and I got an amazing cold-cut sub with some fries. We then swung by Burrito Loco for some rice water. High-fives for not following instructions? Anybody?
I have to say that I am so surprised at how good I feel. I am having almost no cramping and no nausea. I'm still a bit tired and feel like being lazy. But, it's nice having an excuse for my husband to wait on me, for a change.
We will get the fertilization report tomorrow morning. I hope that at least 3 of the seven get fertilized and at least 2 of them make it to the transfer on Sunday. Anything more than that will be gravy. I am thrilled at how it's gone so far. I will update more tomorrow. Thanks for reading!
The bad thing was that I was not allowed to eat AT ALL until an hour after my ER time. After I woke up from the procedure they shoved goldfish in my face and the whole package was gone in a matter of seconds. I was like a rabid raccoon. Shameless.
But let me back up a bit. When we arrived at the clinic I was instructed to give a urine sample. I hadn't had anything to drink since 6am and it was only a small glass of water. Needless to say the sample was small and looked a bit like maple syrup. Not good.
We were then shown our way back to the "man's room" and I was instructed to disrobe from my waist down and put on a glorious gown, booties, and hair net. I was not thrilled that I sent my husband to do his work looking so sexy. I really didn't want him to have too easy of a time. I signed some papers and left Jim to peruse the clinic's erotic DVD selection. He told me later he was not impressed.
I was lead to the way back of the clinic by the anesthesiologist, Doris, to the retrieval room. It was insanely bright. There were at least 10 more florescent lights than needed. In the center of the room was a chair donned with fancy stirrups and surrounded with all sorts of equipment. I was told to take a seat and answered some more questions. Next, my doctor and his nurse entered. Everyone had surgery scrubs, masks, booties, gloves, etc. Sitting there with my legs in the air I found myself feeling like I was in the middle of a Stanley Kubrick movie and something very bazaar was about to take place. It was so surreal.
The doctor turned on Neil Diamond and the very gentle Doris got to work. She placed the IV with no effort and told me she was going to administer the medicine. There was some talk about the Doctor breaking out into song and I told them that was funny and then BAM! I was out.
Next thing I knew, I was in a recliner in the recovery room. Someone could have removed my kidneys, a toe, and probably my soul and I would have had no idea. I was slowly coming out of it and the nurse was checking on me every so often. I kept asking how many eggs they got and where Jim was. The answer was always, "Seven," and,"He's not out yet."
I was very happy about the seven but a little nervous about my husband. After I tore into my goldfish like a honey badger and drank my apple juice he finally came in. I could tell he was irritated. He told me that he was instructed to ring this door bell when he was finished and no one ever came. He told me he waited for almost an HOUR! What?! How long had I been out?! It felt like 15 minutes. Turns out, I was in recovery for over 45 minutes. I highly recommend whatever it was they gave me. Good times.
After I was awake enough to stand and put my pants back on we left. I was told some spotting and light cramping were normal and to not eat anything fried or greasy until tomorrow.
So Jim and I headed straight for Mr. Submarine and I got an amazing cold-cut sub with some fries. We then swung by Burrito Loco for some rice water. High-fives for not following instructions? Anybody?
I have to say that I am so surprised at how good I feel. I am having almost no cramping and no nausea. I'm still a bit tired and feel like being lazy. But, it's nice having an excuse for my husband to wait on me, for a change.
We will get the fertilization report tomorrow morning. I hope that at least 3 of the seven get fertilized and at least 2 of them make it to the transfer on Sunday. Anything more than that will be gravy. I am thrilled at how it's gone so far. I will update more tomorrow. Thanks for reading!
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
CD10 - Big News and a Miracle
I got back from my RE appt and have to say that I have the most wonderful RE EVER!
After doing the internal U/S I was speaking with my Dr about all of the follies that showed up. Today there were 8 between 11-20mm. At least 6 of them were above 15 and a few were around 20. He said a lot of, "Hmmmm." He told me that I responded like an IVFer would have and he would be very happy with my numbers if I were an IVF patient about to trigger. He asked me what was keeping me from doing IVF and I promptly told him it was the money. I told him about our insurance cap and how we only have enough for this IUI cycle and possibly one more, but IVF would cause us to pay at least 5k out of pocket and we just didn't have that.
Then, the most amazing thing happened. He offered to eat the costs above what our insurance will pay! He said that IVF will give us at least a 40% chance and we shouldn't waste all of these follies and he would be willing to work with us! I was in tears and just so amazed that he would do that for us.
The most amazing thing? I am all synced up with their IVF cycle! No BCPs or Lupron to get on their schedule. They are scheduled for egg transfers for this Sunday, Mother's day, and I will make it! If I were even one day off, this wouldn't have worked.
I just can't believe this is happening. Plus, today is the 8th and I have 8 follies brewing! I just feel like everything we've been through has been leading to this.
If it doesn't work, at least we know that we did everything in our power to make it happen and we will have closure. If it works, we will be over the moon and have an amazing story to tell.
This journey has taught me a lot. First and foremost, the generosity of the people around us are boundless. None of this would have happened if I didn't get meds donated to me from a fellow bumpie. And now this. God truly does work through people. I feel so blessed today.
I will go in Thursday, CD12, for an egg retrieval. Then, if all goes well, I will be in on Sunday, Mother's Day, for an embryo transfer.
So, IVF is a completely different animal than IUI. I want to go into it, but not right now. Instead, I will direct anyone who doesn't know about IVF to this:
IVF Video
If any readers have any questions, please let me know. I know most of you know me personally, so feel free to email or call;) And, as always, thanks for reading! I'll update more on Thursday!
After doing the internal U/S I was speaking with my Dr about all of the follies that showed up. Today there were 8 between 11-20mm. At least 6 of them were above 15 and a few were around 20. He said a lot of, "Hmmmm." He told me that I responded like an IVFer would have and he would be very happy with my numbers if I were an IVF patient about to trigger. He asked me what was keeping me from doing IVF and I promptly told him it was the money. I told him about our insurance cap and how we only have enough for this IUI cycle and possibly one more, but IVF would cause us to pay at least 5k out of pocket and we just didn't have that.
Then, the most amazing thing happened. He offered to eat the costs above what our insurance will pay! He said that IVF will give us at least a 40% chance and we shouldn't waste all of these follies and he would be willing to work with us! I was in tears and just so amazed that he would do that for us.
The most amazing thing? I am all synced up with their IVF cycle! No BCPs or Lupron to get on their schedule. They are scheduled for egg transfers for this Sunday, Mother's day, and I will make it! If I were even one day off, this wouldn't have worked.
I just can't believe this is happening. Plus, today is the 8th and I have 8 follies brewing! I just feel like everything we've been through has been leading to this.
If it doesn't work, at least we know that we did everything in our power to make it happen and we will have closure. If it works, we will be over the moon and have an amazing story to tell.
This journey has taught me a lot. First and foremost, the generosity of the people around us are boundless. None of this would have happened if I didn't get meds donated to me from a fellow bumpie. And now this. God truly does work through people. I feel so blessed today.
I will go in Thursday, CD12, for an egg retrieval. Then, if all goes well, I will be in on Sunday, Mother's Day, for an embryo transfer.
So, IVF is a completely different animal than IUI. I want to go into it, but not right now. Instead, I will direct anyone who doesn't know about IVF to this:
IVF Video
If any readers have any questions, please let me know. I know most of you know me personally, so feel free to email or call;) And, as always, thanks for reading! I'll update more on Thursday!
Monday, May 7, 2012
CD9 - Might Get Cancelled
Crap. I had a ton of things growing in there. There were a total of 6 that were in the running. We had 2@17, 2@16, 1@15 and 1@14. The doctor told me not to take my Follistim dose tonight and go back for another follie check tomorrow. If that 14 has shown any growth, he will cancel our cycle:(
I know there are a lot of ladies out there that would grill me for this, but I really don't think that HOM, high order multiples, would happen to us. With Jim's motility issues and my low numbers, I just don't think it could happen. Of course, anything is possible, and right now I'm battling with the notion that we might get pregnant with more than two babies.
Would it be better to cancel the cycle? Or should we go for it and pray for the best? Jim and I will discuss more tomorrow when we get the results. I'll update more then. For now, just call me little miss hen!
I know there are a lot of ladies out there that would grill me for this, but I really don't think that HOM, high order multiples, would happen to us. With Jim's motility issues and my low numbers, I just don't think it could happen. Of course, anything is possible, and right now I'm battling with the notion that we might get pregnant with more than two babies.
Would it be better to cancel the cycle? Or should we go for it and pray for the best? Jim and I will discuss more tomorrow when we get the results. I'll update more then. For now, just call me little miss hen!
CD6 - Follie Check #1
Had a follie check today. I had 3 on my left and 2 on my right. They were all between 10-12mm. I also had 3 at 8mm. He's not counting those yet, though. I go back on Monday for another check. He is shooting for 4 or 5 mature follies. He said if I have 7 or more, the cycle will be canceled.
Feeling pretty good about those numbers. I will be THRILLED if I get to trigger 4 follies. Grow, babies, grow!
*I forgot to update on Friday, this is what happened;)
Feeling pretty good about those numbers. I will be THRILLED if I get to trigger 4 follies. Grow, babies, grow!
*I forgot to update on Friday, this is what happened;)
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
CD3 - All Systems Go!
I had my baseline ultrasound yesterday. My ovaries are looking all clear and I got the go-ahead to start my next injection cycle! My doctor doubled my dose. I am now at 150iu/day of Follistim. I go in on Friday, CD6, for a follie check. I, again, am hoping for 4 follies. However, I would like these follies to mature at the same rate and relatively slow.
I will update more on Friday!
I will update more on Friday!
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